A heavy dose of truth, humor, and political activism.

Location: Phila, Pennsylvania, United States

Thursday, May 11, 2006


BUSH FAMILY TO RUB MORE SALT IN AMERICA'S WOUNDS First Bush Sr. became president and attacked Iraq. Then Bush Jr. became president, attacked Iraq, gained a seconds term in office, and got some like-minded bible thumpers onto the Supreme Court. Now it appears, the Bush family wants Jeb to have a go. I don't know if this is worse for the American public or Iraq. Then again, I don't feel sorry for the 51% of voters who decided four more years of Dubya was a good idea. If they were idiotic enough to think that, they might be thrilled by the idea of half a decade of Jeb. Can't we convict the Bush family of assault on America? If you're fighting someone, and you keep kicking them when they are down, it's no longer self defense, it's assault. The Bush family has already kicked America's ass. Our military is beat up, our education system has a black eye, social security is on life support, our spirit is broken, and like a bully steals milk money, China owns our debt. Just when I thought that the Bush family would leave us crying on the ground, clutching to our last shreds of dignity, they stop, and contemplate turning around and giving us one more solid kick right to the groin. That's right Jeb, as far as America is concerned, your bid for the presidency would be a big old kick in the nuts. I think it's time for the Bush family to stop picking on this country. Sure, people elected them (Bush Sr. anyway), but that's like little kids in the school yard cheering on the bully. They are just being controlled by fear. Here's my suggestion for Jeb. Don't run for President, not now, not ever. Even while your older brother has his lowest approval rating ever (although not quite as bad as the low one your daddy sunk to) your approval rating is still over 55% in Florida. That means one of two things, you are actually doing a decent job in Florida and should stick to what you're good at, or Floridians are idiots. Before you run for president, most likely win (given the voting record of the red states), and then fall into total disfavor with your country, stop and think. History will most likely speak poorly of your father and your brother (unless they find a way to write their own history like Dubya's home boy Jesus did), do you really want to join them? Right now you're only an ass hole because your last name is Bush (and possibly because you helped rig an election Mr. Hanging Chad) but why become an ass hole because your actions as President dictate it? Your mom and brother Neil aren't exactly holding up the honor of the Bush family name, but you can, and it's as simple as not running for Commander in Chief. The decision is yours, but in my opinion, the last thing I want to see growing on the lawn of the White House is another Bush (regime). USA YESTERDAY While browsing through Yahoo on Wednesday to update my fantasy baseball team, I came across a story that ran Tuesday in USA TODAY(.COM). Here's the link: Coins cost more to make than face value: Financial News - Yahoo! Finance. Hmm, this sounds strangely like a story that ran in Spoon, Full of Truth way back on April 24th. USA TODAY? More like USA Three Weeks Ago. Go back into the archives and read the post titled "A penny saved is a penny earned...or is it?" and then read the USA TODAY story. Could it be that USA TODAY is using the Spoon as its latest news source? It certainly seems that way. It's been said that imitation is the greatest form of flattery. I didn't know you liked me like that USA TODAY. How long have you felt this way? I'm sorry to say it's pretty one sided. I don't really like you in that way. Maybe we can just be friends? You're just not hip enough for me. With a name like USA TODAY, you should be reporting the news of, wait for it, wait for it....TODAY?! If you really have nothing better to do than recycle my stories from a few weeks ago, you should get a hobby. I think you'd find ethics very interesting, you should try looking it up to see what it means. (As I was finishing this post, I also saw a report about the same story on the Colbert Report. It seems that many media outlets are tuning into the Spoon when their own news-wire runs thin) WOULD A ROSE BY ANY OTHER NAME REALLY SMELL AS SWEET? I had lunch with my friend Alan the other day at a nice restaurant over looking the park near our apartment building. As we sat there talking over our meal, the topic of naming things came up. We wondered how someone had first looked at a rock and determined to call it a rock, or how someone had looked at a tree and decided to call it a tree. At some point I mentioned the famous Shakespeare quote. It got me thinking. I don't think a rose by any other name really would smell as sweet. If it was called a cock-blossom, I wouldn't want to bring a dozen of them home to my wife and have her take a big whiff. If roses were called crotch rots, do you think they'd make crotch rot scented candles and air freshener? Let your brain marinate in that this weekend. WHY DID THE CHICKEN CROSS THE ROAD? To learn the truth of course, one Spoon, Full of it at a time. Enjoy the weekend everyone. See you next week.


Anonymous Anonymous said...

"Right now you're only an ass hole because your last name is Bush (and possibly because you helped rig an election Mr. Hanging Chad)"... I would add legalizing murder, subjecting third-graders to the FCAT tests, disenfranchising rather than rehabilitating and reincorporating ex-felons, and having a first name like JEB to a long list of other reasons he is an asshole.

May 12, 2006 11:40 AM  

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