MINIMUM WAYS (OF THE GOP)

REPUBLICANS WAGE WAR ON MINIMUM WAGE Republicans followed their own rhetoric of “stay the course” in another blindly selfish and harmful way this week when they voted against a bill to raise the minimum wage. The current minimum wage of $5.15 an hour has been in effect for almost a decade. The Senate vote marked the ninth time since 1997 that Democrats there have proposed, and Republicans have blocked, a stand-alone increase in the minimum wage. Ted Kennedy, D-Mass, proposed a bill that would increase the minimum wage to $5.85 beginning 60 days after the legislation was enacted; to $6.55 one year later; and to $7.25 a year after that. He said inflation has eroded the value of the current $5.15 minimum wage by 20 percent. "I am opposed to it, and I think a vast majority of our (rank and file) is opposed to it," House Majority Leader John Boehner, R-Ohio, said Tuesday. Shocker there; Republicans are opposed to giving a little more to the poor. It is after all, election time. While Democrats depend on organized labor to win elections, Republicans are closely aligned with big-business interests that oppose any increase in the federal wage floor or changes in the current system. The Republican party is no longer a political party, it is a business. It is a corporation that offers to protect the interest of other profitable corporations. Why would corporations want an increase in the minimum wage? I'm sure, if they could, they would do away with the minimum wage altogether. The Republicans will continue to spew the company line, saying that a minimum wage increase would wind up hurting the low-wage workers that Democrats said they want to help. "For every increase you make in the minimum wage, you will cost some of them their jobs," said Sen. Johnny Isakson, R-Ga. Poor corporate America! Let me just pause here for a second to allow you all to shed a tear for the major corporations and their financial woes. The Republican line states that if you put more money in the pockets of the rich that it will trickle down to the middle class and the poor. They are dead wrong. The rich get richer. The poor stay poor. Interestingly enough, during the nine year period that the Republicans have shot down the nine proposals by Democrats to raise the minimum wage, Ted Kennedy said that the annual salaries of lawmakers have risen by about $30,000. He also said a worker who earns the minimum wage will make approximately $10,700 a year. Over the last decade these clowns have given themselves raises that alone earn them more in a year than a minimum wage worker makes in three. Yet they won't even consider giving our nation’s poor an extra dollar an hour. These people have no choice. Work for minimum wage, or join the military. It works right into the hands of the GOP. How different things would be if U.S. citizens went to the polls and voted on pay raises (and decreases) for lawmakers instead of lawmakers voting on it themselves. It is easy to stay the course when you aren't the one on the course. It’s easy to say, “keep our soldiers in Iraq” or “keep our minimum wages low” if it doesn't effect you. I think every lawmaker who votes to stay the course on these issues should have to fly to Iraq, relieve a soldier there so they can come home, stay until the rest of the troops come home, and then come back to America and earn $5.15 an hour for 3 years. BUSH FAMILY VALUES U.S. code states the following: TITLE 4 > CHAPTER 1 > § 8§ 8. Respect for flag: The flag should never have placed upon it, nor on any part of it, nor attached to it any mark, insignia, letter, word, figure, design, picture, or drawing of any nature. Now please refer to the photo at the top of this post (bottom photo). Who is that signing his name on the old Red, White, and Blue? Duh. It's Dubya. Another classic Bush example of "Do as I say, not as I do". Aren't Republicans the ones so up in arms about meaningless issues like flag burning? Personally, I'd rather see a thousand U.S. flags being burned than see this joke of a President sign his name on even one more of them. George Bush signing his name on the U.S. flag is more offensive than OJ's claim that he's going to find Nicole Brown's real killer. In other Bush news this week, Bush's nephew, Pierce "What Me Worry" Bush, son of George's brother Neil Bush (lover of Asian hookers, savings and loan thief, and producer of the computer software being offered to Katrina victims as a "relief aid") showed that like the rest of the Bush family, he knows how to party. In the second photo shown at the top of this post (top photo), You can see young Pierce Bush enjoying himself at a college party with his half-naked, much older man friend. Those Bush's sure can party. Why not kick back and enjoy yourself? It's not like there is a war going on. Isn't that a bottle of beer in his hand? I guess they've lowered the drinking age in Texas to 20. Then again, compared to Uncle George's cocaine binges, what's a few beers at a frat party? What do you think a Bush family reunion weekend is like? Everyone sits around the camp fire and shares tales of draft dodging, drug/alcohol use, and fraud (financial and election). When that's done, they all deface the U.S. flag, and wipe their butts with the original copies of the constitution. Sounds like a hoot. For crying out loud, will you idiots PLEASE stop the Bushit. HOLE IN ONE MILLION Two weekends ago I went to Delaware to open up my family's shore house for the summer. My wife, Julia, and my friend Alan came with me. Alan and I have always been mini-golf fanatics and there is no shortage of mini-golf courses at the shore so the three of us decided to indulge ourselves and play a few courses. The first course was an Australian theme and Alan won. The second course was a Pirate theme. I won that one. No one pirate golf's like I pirate golf. This course had a 19th hole where you had to hit the ball up a tiny ramp, off a jump and into a treasure chest. It is all but impossible. I came the closest to getting the free game but none of us proved worthy. Julia is a good sport and enjoys mini-golf but never really beats Alan or I. We've been playing since we were little kids and have fully honed our skills. Last summer, while Julia and I were playing indoor Ocean-theme mini-golf, she scored her first hole in one. I think that's when she really started to like mini-golf. A little taste of success can go a long way. After Pirate golf, we moved on to Safari golf. It was a tight game and was very close until the very end when Alan pulled away and won. This course also had a 19th hole for the free game. You had to hit the ball up a ramp, off a jump and into the mouth of a hippo (complete with many teeth to block the ball's entry). Alan went first and missed. I went second and missed. Julia asked if I wanted to hit her ball for her and I told her no. Although I might have a better chance of winning, it would mean so much more if she did it herself. She put the ball of the mat, took her little swing, and the ball flew straight into the hippo's mouth. Hole in one. The walk-way back to the office to return the clubs and claim and the free game is about 50 yards long. The wife half skipped, half galloped, and half ran (yes I am aware that is three halves) her way to the office and proudly received her free game ticket. I don't think the guy working there had ever seen such an excited reaction. She did the same cute shuffle back to the hippo where we took her picture with the hippo as she held up her free game. The sign above the hippo read, "Free game for ball in mouth". It was a great moment in her mini-golf career and I just wanted to give it the recognition it deserves. WHERE DID JUNE GO? Does anyone else feel like June just flew by? Crazy. It feels like this post just flew by too doesn't it? You just started reading and now it's come to an end. Don't fret, check back soon, for an all new edition of the Spoon.