BUSH BAITS HOOK AS HE PREPARES TO LURE BLACK VOTERS The White House announced Tuesday that President Bush plans to speak to the NAACP for the first time since taking office. This comes somewhat as a surprise after Bush rejected the civil rights group's invitations for five straight years. Every president for the past several decades has spoken to the group. Until now, Bush had been the exception. Bush's decision comes in a critical midterm election year, when Republicans fear losing control of Congress and Bush has been working to get more votes for the GOP. Bush received just 11 percent of the black vote in the 2004 election. White House spokesperson Tony Snow outlined the Presidents agenda, "He has an important role to play, not only in making the case for civil rights, but maybe more importantly, the case for unity," Snow said. "Because as long as we have a nation that's in any way divided along racial lines or where politics become a source of division rather one of civil debate and trying to perfect the democracy, that's a problem." A nation divided along racial lines under this President? Never! George Bush honestly thought that blacks enjoyed being stranded on their roof tops in New Orleans. They made signs and everything. It looked like they were having a good time. Bush even called the effort, “one heckuva job”! Besides, his mother donated a whole bunch of money to pay for his brother’s educational software to be donated to Katrina victims. I think they already got their education. They will all receive honorary degrees from the University of Bush-doesn’t-care-about-black-people. What about his refusal to raise the minimum wage? That has nothing to do with race. He just wants to encourage minimum wage workers to work harder because if there’s one thing Dubya believes in, it’s working hard for everything you get, and having nothing (like a Yale education, the Texas Rangers, or the Presidency of the United States) handed to you. What about all the accusations of voter fraud, accounts of black votes not being counted, voting machines in urban areas failing, and blacks being harassed at the polls? It must be a coincidence. George Bush is a politician, not an electrician. He has no idea how computerized voter machines work. Better to leave that sort of thing to the experts. If I were a member of the NAACP, knowing full well that Bush was only coming to address my association because he believed it would benefit his political agenda, I would line up a few curve ball questions to catch him off-guard. If nothing else, this should serve as an example of why African Americans should vote against Bush and the Republicans in the next election (whether their votes will actually be counted or not). REVISITING OLD HAUNTS I went to lunch today with my father, my wife, and a good friend of mine. While at lunch my friend told us that he had reconnected with an old college girlfriend over the weekend. When I say reconnected, I mean that literally parts of their anatomies reconnected. My wife commented that she had never gone back years later and slept with someone that she had been involved with in the past. My first reaction was to compare it to music. Everyone has gotten a new CD at some point and thought it was the hottest shit they have ever heard. You can’t get enough of it. You play it over and over and over again. Eventually, you listen to it so much that you get sick of it. You toss the CD in some box or something and move on to a new band or CD that you haven’t heard before. You might come across the old disk once or twice in the next year and, still sick of it, don’t even give it a second glance. After a while you forget you even own it. Years later, you come across the CD while going through old things, looking for something completely non-related. You pick it up, read the back, think about how much you used to enjoy it, and realize that so much time has passed, that you’re no longer sick of it and would really enjoy giving it another listen. You pop it into your CD player and press play. You are instantly taken back to the time in your life when you first fell in love with the music. Not only that, but you’re able to appreciate the songs on a whole new level. You have a different understanding and appreciation of the music; your ear is more refined. That’s exactly what happens when you have sex with someone again after years and years without it. The sex is great again. When you first start sleeping with someone, the sex is usually the best. It’s exciting, new, and exotic. After a while, it might still be good, but it’s lost that edge it once had like when you heard that hot new track for the first time. I encourage all of you that have the chance to call up that old boyfriend or girlfriend that you haven’t connected with in years, pop them into your “CD player”, and give them another listen. I think you’ll be very surprised at how good sounds after all this time. HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME! I would like to thank everyone who came out to the Mansion on Friday to support me, and the Spoon, Full of Truth on my birthday. For those of you that didn’t attend, you missed a good time. It was a great mix of people (many of whom I hadn’t seen in years) and everyone seemed to get along, enjoy some cocktails, and have a great time. I thoroughly enjoyed myself and it was really nice to be surrounded by supportive friends and family members for an evening. Thanks to all of you. I also unveiled the new Spoon, Full of Truth.com T-shirts at the party (and thank you to Dan Robinson for designing the logo and my wife Julia and friend Alan for helping in the production of the shirts) and they received rave reviews. They will be available shortly through this site and I hope all of you Spoon supports will get one and wear it with pride. Nothing says “I have exquisite taste and a superior intellect” like a Spoon, Full of Truth.com t-shirt. I will be posting the photos of the event online soon so keep your eyes out for the link in an upcoming post. Check back soon to get more truth, straight from the Spoon.